| Sunday, October 30th, 2005 |
| 4:54 pm |
halloween----my night
basically im in love with halloween and last night was a GORGEOUS night... hahahhahahahhaha so first we went to a party with the village people and a huge penis... haha then we split and went to bannister and morressy's and were already completely wasted... then analisa and i proceeded ot leave there with rebecca and tiffany to go ot barsalona... AWEsome time.. haha wow is all i have to say.. and uhh we took shots of whiskey and jager and beer because the bartender gave it to us because he didnt have the stuff at that bar downstairs for irish car bombs.. ?? lots and lots.. so therefore i had vodka and lots of it, then beer, then whistkey jager more beer.. and the night goes on.. so we danced on the tables.. what reason.. i donno why... tiffany is awesome... we lost rebecca but she left and me anal tiff and some guy tiff knew got in his ferrari, 2 seater, then switched and got into a jag.. umm the nicest cars i have ever been in....and he drove us to crowbar.. which we got split from the guys and 2 other guys walked out and we ended up going in a cab with them and going to la passage and went in the back red carpeted entrace.. where MICHAEL JORDON and another group of bball men walks 2 feet in front of us, walking out... OMG it was really him.. and i sooo knew it because its MICHAEL JORDON.. sorry but that amazed me... then we went in there and danced alllll night.. ditched those guys after they got us more jager shots... and tiffany continues to pull me up on the cube with her to dance... sooo ya we were wasted... i loved this night because it was ridiculous... and i cant even remember half.. now im dying from drinking all that and whiskey... and ya.. were going to be going back to barsonla and la passage... great great times... um but gross i got attacked by a batman and he kept on trying to make out with me.. then i did and i dont know why... sick.. but it didnt ruin my night!!! |
| Sunday, October 9th, 2005 |
| 3:06 am |
:(
tonight.. wow where do i begin.. i dont even know what to say.. i have never seen this side of jeremy... he was litteraly pushing us around and almost beating up us.. i didnt know what to do.. we were stuck on a bad street, he wouldnt listen and us girls were crying... all of us trying to hold down a guy... ridiculous.. im soo upset i cant believe he did that to court after all shes been through in the past... sriously i fucking hate guys.. no one deserves to be treated taht way.. i dont know know what shes going to do.. i feel terrible for his parents also.. who said he has seizures when he gets that drunk... or something.. blahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh and then come back.. i left ot hang out with the nighbors because i really didnt evne know what to do.. there such nice guys... they were looking out for us but rob comes back with analisa and ended up getting terribly sick... And the other night i almost died... i dont evne like to driink.. i dont know what im doing.. i told my mom that i was really sick too.. bdlksfjdlskfjdslkjfdjlk right now i dont even know what i want... really.. the things that i were saying when i was drunk last night was ridiculous apparently.. i like said everything on my mind and really i need to just get over stuff that happens to me.. i acutally called blake otnight because i didnt know waht to do..hes the only one that answered.. and really the only one that cares besides my friends... im soo shitty to people... i dont even know really... the things that used to be important to me are gone.. |
| Monday, October 3rd, 2005 |
| 2:34 am |
soooo excited~
COurntey is comingggg in 5 days!! wahooo and were gonna call sam because we miss him dearly! i seriously think he was one of my favorite people.....ohhh memories of freshmen year.....old style... ha ha welll i finally figured out what was going on... and its good now, i can really only laugh at it and myself of course... .. i think the confusion is the only thing that bothered me and maked me upset, but once im clear i am great again.. its sick.... like feeling rejected bothers me most but once i am aware then im totally fine.. and move right on.... funny thing is i may of looked crazy but i wasnt used to the situation of meeting.. dont think i would be able to do that again... cmon theres always a replacement that way for the people are used to it and when its brought to me visually i cant deal with it.... but ya i looked past alot of things and i learn to never compromise...and looking like a idiot for my feelings ,like analisa said, were enhanced by the situation... oh well ha i learned something about myself. thats for sure.. in the shortest relationship ever yet seemingly alot longer... weird huh.... But anyways im sooooooo excited 4 court ! and I also told ross finally that we can hang out because he asks and i never call or reply and that was mean of me.. and unlike me... which is weird because i have been very unlike myself lately.. like brian was being nice and i was a complete bitch to him and told him he was a huge mistake in my life...haha who knows... like every guy that gave me attention of the time of day i was a complete bitch to him.... im a strange one sometimes.... ps best dance party ever tonight.. and i never seen emma soo excited.. ha ha ha |
| Sunday, October 2nd, 2005 |
| 2:13 am |
whats been going on.. lets see... so thurs night we had a beer co reunion.. friday we went to watch the Scary exorcism movie then mikey and lalo had all the guys over to just hang out drink and play beer pong so dani emma and i went over to hang out and what not..so mikey told me he had a child the first time i met him..last year,... and i always believed him because naturally i believe everyone and then it turned out he didnt and weirdly enough one of there sits in their apartment was a child safety seat... weirdos. i wasnt going to drink any beer but dani made me...then today was out all day.. came back and got ready again to go to blue man.. which we were really stoned for...it was crazy.. and like when they left or whatever.. me and emma left to go to the bathroom and like in the hall we ran into one of the blue men... which freaked us both out because he like tried to scare us.. i was more scared of being on the big screen that was following.. im not good at those volunteering for group proformances.. i will never forget when i did that at sea world or some place like that and actually got picked... they made me put a fish in my mouth and then the dolphin ate it out of my mouth.. crazy stuff... ohhh boo i miss being a kid.. grew up way to fast... So we definitely need to go to seaworld, disney world and universal sometime soon... i miss it all! anyways wow sidetrack.. so tehre were alot of parties tonight.. sains, dave and matts, garret had all like 20 of his friends here and neighbors asked us to go to some 100 floor tall building roof party.. wtf.. sketchy guys.. ya so what did me a nd anal decide on doing... smoking more..... naturally.. so my mom canceled coming and yesterday and today she says shes coming sunday.. yep definitely another lie... she calls at like 5 and changes her mind... i swear the funny thing is the second time she told me she and my dad were coming i knew she was lying because i just knew she would change her mind.... sad that i already expect the disappointment... and she ends up yelling at me.. when i did absolutely nothing...but actually say that i am upset... wow anyways so again all i have is myself i need to talk to someone because i think im more upset than i let off... i just keep everything inside and the couple of times i actually say stuff its a huge mistake because i am put down to look like a idiot...or feel like one Current Music: sparks coldplay |
| Tuesday, September 27th, 2005 |
| 7:55 pm |
so now my mom says she might not be coming to visit... yes another great let down that always seems to happen... why would i believe that this time..... and i feel like the same question is asked every time i talk to her.... every single time.. i never get away from itdmsafnklsdajfjsdkjafhjklsdjjflksdajfla k;sdjdflkjfsd Current Mood:  disappointed |
| Thursday, September 22nd, 2005 |
| 1:18 am |
\ Current Music: Diamond Form Sierra Leone |
| Tuesday, September 20th, 2005 |
| 3:30 am |
HOOOOTTTTTTTTTTTAAAAA
all i have to say is i believe our hoovering apartment is the best idea.. and us ruling the world! yes finally... by the way we own the world... PUUUUUPPPPPPY \ |
| 1:47 am |
so i think im getting sick.. and have a weird itchy rash on my neck that looks like a hicky... not cool.. i better be better for thurs because i dont have class i beleive in my first two classes on friday therefore were gonna pay a little vist to our old friend mr beer co.. for analisas birthday week celebration!! wahoooo ohh no always a bit of trouble at the beer co...i really try not to think into things but i know when i do i am usually right.. its like a gift.. yaya! ha ps. i <3 watching and listening to 6'8'' black guys moans and whine to pilates.. hahahaha funniest thing ever. thank you for that |
| Sunday, September 18th, 2005 |
| 2:33 pm |
oh boy
so it was one of those nights... so anal dani emmie and i all went to linsdays party.. anal and i drank lots of vodka .. got a little drunk.. talked to history man from our class.. we were confused because all the army guys or rotc whatever. guys were there with cowboy hats on but ya we left and went to omalleys... haha fun times.. we pretty much were being eyed like a peice of meet because it was full of all guys.. we were soo drunk took our jager bomb and left.. then walked to mikey and lalas.. where all the guys were hanging out and we tried to convince them to leave but then for some reason me and anal ended up parting from the guys and meeting cassie, her bf and maggie at glasscots or something... yes on the way , me and anal tried peeing on the side of a busy street.. but at glasscots wow... what a weird night.. so this attractive man was ridiculous and started saying "bubble gym bubble gum in a ditch how many pieces do i wish" and pointing at our feeling going around.. weird... we got serenaded by like 3 different sets of guys... oh ya i told some guy my name was george..he ended up getting pissed at me.. haha im evil.. oh well and other stuff happened.. i forget some.. yes wow who knows ever |
| Monday, September 12th, 2005 |
| 12:53 am |
this weekend
so what happened this weekend.. hmm actually i didnt go out.. stayed in snuggling with mikey.. he stayed over twice.. i missed hanging out with him this summer... although i believe i am sick now.. how i have no idea... By the way our PE intense but i sorta love it! the basketball players crack me up... well today randomly analisa emma dj and i went to the musical wicked because dj had 2 extra tickets.. that was real fun! makes me wish i could sing then we had a ice cream social haha were losers.. throw our smelling bananas at the apartment across the street.. Yes im amazing and made it to their porch.. Then me analisa and garret hung out and talked.. Now im exciting for friday and moursey party and pregaming at garrets place.. oh boy.. hahaa i love him subtle drunkness.. the besst ever! Not to mention he wants us to pick him off the ground kinda drunk! so me and analisa just had a 2 hour dance party.. hahahahhahaa good old times! |
| Thursday, September 8th, 2005 |
| 12:08 pm |
so last night.. wow enough said
alright best birthday ever! although worst day after before 2... pretty sure i have never been that drunk... And i got my birthday wish to be surrounded by wasted friends and thus far the throw up count was 4 for 4.. with many that have yet to check in.... so somehow randomly me and emma separated ourselves from the group got in a cab and no idea how we got into our apartment.. i pretty much spent the night over the trash can... our neighbors may be in love with us because were ridiculous messes every night and answer our door in underwear.. in analisa case last night.. a thong.. so thank you everyone for feeding me shots until i died... what great friends! and for those who got the honor to receive drunk dials.. i sincerely apologize Current Mood: unbelievable pain |
| Tuesday, September 6th, 2005 |
| 11:13 am |
alright so pretty sure i got no sleep.. so what has been going on.. well we moved into our place and i lovvvvve having a apartment! so the first night we bought wine and none of us ate all day so we were completely wasted.. so much that i dont really recall everything that occured.. i remember going to bannisters and morrseys and had lots of fun.. i missed going over there... and we were stupid and left to go to lincoln station which wasnt that fun.. but we were trashed so it was great.. me and anal were so drunk we struggled on freestyle rapping which never happens when were drunk.. ya and emmie got sick so i went home with her ... we met anals man but i only remember his gotee.. and him trying to convince us ot let him drive us back but i guess we ran off.. then our neighbors had to let us in our door because we could unlock it.. good thing the only guys in our building share a floor with usl.. otherwise we might die many nights.. and i proceeded the night with multiply drunk dials, none of which i remember.... so yesterday we ran errands and had a laguna party... anal left to go out wiht garret and dj to go to will and pats party btu i ddint want to go because it was gonna be a freshmen party and those are always 2 crowded.. ya anyways ya i got bored when they got back so i had garret show me his place but of course he didnt have his keys so i have yet to meet his new roommates and he passed out on the love sac.. alright were supposely meeting up with some people at breakfast at toast but hopefully that willl change Current Music: cant fight this feeling anymore |
| Saturday, September 3rd, 2005 |
| 2:55 am |
so i finally leave tomorrow! im so excited wahooooo... too bad we dont move in until sunday.. oh still.. ya so i still havnt really packed. I repainted my nails instead and talked on the phone. i decided that i have no trust.. therefore i dont think it would work and my guy friends i have talked to it about say its not a good idea... blah confusion.. Yes so the hurricane stuff is soo sad and devastating.. Its soo sad :(... so awkward goodbye when i agreed to hangout with blake.. so pretty much the entire time we hung out he was telling me "i hate you" over and over again and it was getting really annoying and being weird and saying we havnt hung out in a while then toward the end he got mad because i wouldnt hang out a little longer to watch a movie and talk... then he started saying how hes gonna miss me.. wtf.. i dont get guys.. first he says he hates me.. and now miss me.. somehow i dont think that works very good.anways.. WAHOOO school! alright i must sleep.. |
| Monday, August 29th, 2005 |
| 6:29 am |
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh so my thoughts brought me back to a terrible situation i got myself into and im to blame.. but you know i cant make that a factor in everything i do....... but i just want it to leave my head...... adklflkfldfkdfjddddddddd i just cant stand stl and my parents know it.. they have never seen me this way... one mroe weekkkkkkkk Current Music: Creep- damien rice |
| Saturday, August 27th, 2005 |
| 6:37 am |
yay for never sleeping
so i never can sleep at the right hours i swear.. im soo excited now that i know we can get into the oz on sundayyyyyyyyy fun fun fun fun.. god who knows who will end up showing up and finding us because i told a couple different people to. Lets see what else is new, well only a week left which is really weird but im very excitedddd.... so the other day my mom told me that ryans old roommate was asking how i like chicago and now she wants me to date him.. ha ha ha ha funnny i think i used to have a crush on him tho.. anyways yesi dont really know right now and i hate when people play with my head, maybe thats why i stay neutral and say nothing.. who knows but ya today i need to go to the j and possibly go shopping.. i feel really bad to what i do to blake but i dont know like i just dont have those kind of feelings for him.. and it makes me soo uncomfortable, he like calls me when i dont hang out with him and i swear he says nothing and it just bothers me that he doesnt talk.. but he wants to hang out or what not and who knowssssss i dont want to hurt him because hes such a sweeet guy. and i know exactly what is happening urghhhhhhhhhh helpppppp me.. Current Mood:  confused |
| Friday, August 26th, 2005 |
| 4:39 am |
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| Thursday, August 25th, 2005 |
| 11:10 am |
so last night wa a good time.. lets just say i got so wasted i ended up smoking a cigar and about to drive 30 mins to this guys ryans house.... then i told chris we woiuld go drink with him when everyone elft my house.. 30 mins the opposite direction of ryan.. good thing court passed out instead..wonderful... now i must sleep for as long as possible because jeremy came in my house and woke us up early, he pretty much sucks. oh ya and my ass bone on my left side is still sore from my collision on the rollerblades from the other day.. i dont think ill ever be the same.boo |
| Wednesday, August 24th, 2005 |
| 3:14 am |
so i have major problem with when things get weird i get lost or when i feel too smothered i become distant..another thing i realized is when i get hurt or upset for some reason i dont give another chance.. why am i that way... So since im not a whore or do lots of drugs or what not.. i dont want someone that does either.. i want someone that can make me a better person and i can learn from.... random thoughts because i realized lately that i have been distant to the people that actually care and opposite to the people that care less.. now all i need is a good cuddle (not sex) |
| 2:20 am |
so last night was fun... its good to just talk about anything and everything.. adam is a sweetheart...i swear everytime i go to a restaurant he seems to be there or working there... ha the john date situation.. oh god! but today.. so i went roller blading at a different park than the one we usually go to.. definitely a bad idea.. so of course right as the hill is big and going down.. my teacher/stopper gets a phone call and goes a different direction leaving me to stop for my own.. so naturally i thought the grass would be the best solution.. well instead of staying up.. yes definitely wiped out in the outfield of an softball game in session .. naturally i couldnt stop laughing.. because im a huge loser like that and laugh instead of cry when i get hurt.. who knows.. but yes.. i am now officially scared to roller blade... yaya for birthdayyyys! so we officially decided what our first themed party will be.. A toga party! yaya! hurray.. so now i have to get creative to make one.. speaking of dressing up.. i cannnnnnt wait till some of my favorites come to visit me this year.. court rob jeremy and some soco guys.. wahoooooooooooo (those nights could become incriminating because the soco guys always end up trouble) ya so sorry were going to probably go to sephanies new apartment which is strangely in the same complex as stevens which i can never forget the awkward night of me and court being completely wasted there with steven and ben and i broke something in his bathroom and we got attacked.. haha and he was an ass to this guy who called my cell and the guy stopped talking to me for like a month.. wow haha so ya anyways stephanies s.. and the "hot abercrombie boys" ha ha ah hahahahhahhahaha less than 2 weeks! and hopefully on wed my favorite dancing drunk buddy will be at my favorite bar.. watch ill end up having yet another class with him |
| Sunday, August 21st, 2005 |
| 3:32 am |
so since i have been in stl i think i have been somewhat depressed because even thwen friends want to hang out.. i just dont want to.. whats wrong with me... i gotta get outta here.. well i guess they had enough and payed me a surprise visit tonight before everyone is like off. Last night was funnnnnnnnnnnnnnn i miss those guys... yes swimming and jumping on the trampoline with everyone all night saying our good byes.. was fun! im sad courtney wasnt there because she was down at sms.. but ya Seriously everyone is off at college.. stupid depaul, staying late.. grrrrrrrrrrrrr |
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